Thursday, April 20, 2006

Idol Chatter

The pretty boy has left the building.

I am afraid that this post will contain little snark this week, as, overall, I was quite impressed with most (read: everyone but Pickler) of the performances this week. And I even loved Rod Stewart...not his performance, mind you, because I just don't care for him....especially when he does a standard like "The Way You Look Tonight." All I can hear is "Iiiiifff you want my body, and you think I'm sexy, come on, baby, let me knowwwww..." Vom. I thought his interaction with the Idols was fun and helpful and complimentary and his baby was really cute, too.

The show started with Chris "He's Hot" Daughtry, sans eye makeup (thank goodness) singing "What a Wonderful World." They guy proved Simon and much of the viewing world that he was more than just a Scott Stapp impersonator. He was sweet and vulnerable and gorgeous. The song showed a completely different side of him - and his voice. He can sing without growling and grimacing and looking like he might eat a newborn for breakfast. YAY!

Paris came next. She was apparently late for her gig as a flight attendant with Southwest Airlines. I didn't get it. Loved the song (she channeled Billie Holiday beautfully during her rendition of "These Foolish Things"), hated the outfit. She is certainly quite a talent on stage, even though off stage she sounds slightly retarded. (Okay, maybe the post will have a little snark. I can't help it.)

Taylor sang Sam Cooke's "You Send Me" while, once again, wearing a pair of pants that are so tight you can see his daddy parts. Eww. The first part of the song was, as Simon said, "cabaret"...which I thinks means, in his world, boring kareoke, but the spastic guy rocked it out at the end with all the crazy arm movements and weird Gumby poses. I loved it. It was truly fun to watch...slightly embarrassing, but fun all the same.

Elliott came out next, looking so cute in a little jacket with a boutonniere. It is truly amazing what the AI stylists have done with Elliott's look...before,, Frodo's good-looking twin. Very nice. He sang "It Had to Be You" - and it was great. The guy showed some not-really-seen-before personality and had a good time with the song. He looked like he finally deserved to be on that stage. Loved it.

Kellie Pickler. Pickler, Pickler, Pickler. She was waaaay over her head this week. She attempted to warble through "Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered." She had major intonation issues, couldn't stay with the band, and was, overall, pretty freakin' sucky. Seriously, she needs to go back to Albemarle and perform on Nickel Beer Nights at Showgirls. I think she would be much more successful. These songs are just too classy for her. Honestly, it was the absolute worst performance of the night, and probably her worst of the season.

Oh holy hell. Ace, buddy...what the hell did you do to yourself? Ace looked like a cross between a 90's frat boy (seriously, my brother had that hair in the 90's while he was social chair of Alpha Tau Omega...hence - 90's frat boy hairdo) and a mobster. He slicked his hair into this little Pebbles ponytail and had on a black suit and blue tie. Yikes. He sang "That's All"...and it...wasn't that bad. He is just so damn nasal. But, I guess if I had that cute of a nose, I would sing through it too :) But yeah. He's next.

Ahhh...they saved the best for last. Kat was last with "Someone to Watch Over Me" - one of my all time favorite songs both to hear and to sing. Kat has a lovely mezzo voice, with great presence and poise and a true mastery of lyrics. You can tell that the girl has had some lessons! She was breathtaking, really. My one complaint: what what up with the close up of the girl's face??? I could count her freakin' pores! She looked beautiful from top to bottom...couldn't they have pulled the shot back just a bit!

Overall - just amazing. Great, great show.

Wednesday...cruelty at its most AI. First, having to listen to Rod Stewart...then splitting the singers in two groups and making Taylor pick which one was NOT the bottom three singers. Such a tough call, what with Chris (who has been golden up until now) in one group with Ace and Paris (both of whom have beem the bottom three)...and Katharine and Elliott (both of whom have been in the bottom three) and Kellie (who never has been, but damnit, if she shouldn't be this week). Taylor chose correctly, after faking Ryan out with a handshake to Chris, and walked to Katharine's side., Not so safe. It's safe to say....he's had a bad day. ;) Goodbye, Ace - you and your beanies and nasty scar and camera f*cking and nasally George Michael Jackson sound have to go!

Next week...Andrea Bocelli. Okay. The theme..."Greatest Love Songs." Oh. Alright. What I thought in my head (b/c I am evil) was...Songs by Blind People. All Ray Charles, Stevie Wonder, Ronnie Milsap, and that guy that sang "Angel Eyes." Woo hoo!

Kelly P. OUT.

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